October

Greetings everyone!

Sorry it’s been ages since I made a blog post but my mind has been so preoccupied with the crazy rotations of this world. It always feels odd to me to write about my life as it’s happening, I need time to process all that’s going on or what I have done.

Oh, what have I done? It’s so interesting to look back at the past couple of months and realize what has gone on. It feels like I just got here yesterday and I’m still a baby attempting to balance on new legs trying to place one foot in front of the other. I’m happy here but as before unsure of what I want in life, but I have dreams and values that became part of my foundation many years ago, those things I hold dear.

I guess that although I’m here making friends, and creating a community within itself I also know deep down that in less then a year those people will leave and new ones will come to take there places. I just question weather or not I want to have to say goodbye at the end of each year to the people I love… it gets hard after a while.

On the other hand I have this great opportunity if I stay here and I know I will learn so much about the world, other human beings and myself. How could one pass that up? I guess I really miss my family and friends back in Seattle you all feel millions of miles away from me…as if in another world all together. Many of us here have discussed how we have this extreme desire to share with you what it is we are doing here, but no words could capture what we feel or do. Camphil is a place of historical nurturing a place of loving dedication. You really have to be here and see for yourself, I could fill page after page just trying to describe one day of my life here.

I also want to say now that as much as I want to write to you all about the pupils I work with and show you the millions of photos I have taken, but I can’t. The laws are tight and I have to respect the wishes of the parents. So I will have to be careful of what I write on here!

I guess if I could somehow re-capture the term I would say it went well. We all had our struggles as we begun our new relationships with these pupils and we had our moments of brilliance. I certainly had my fair share of hard times and millions of wonderful moments that always seem to win and make you forget the tough times. Life is like that though, when we have these moments that make us so happy, when we laugh so hard we fall over, when someone tells us they love us or even an unexpected pat on the back at supper; those moments make all the negative things melt away and all you can do is forgive and let go. When someone shows signs of challenging behavior there is always a reason and a right to do so. I believe that they are simply testing their will as well as trying to communicate. Many of our pupils can’t communicate the way we do, and this as you can imagine is frustrating. If you could not say what was bothering you and there were tons of people around you telling you what to do and you don’t feel well, you would find someway to make people notice. Weather that’s hitting, biting, scratching, screaming, or running away you name it I have experienced it. These things can be avoided most of the time; it’s just a matter of trying your best to help your pupil communicate and by teaching them coping strategies. You do need to push them though; it’s through those moments you can teach them the most. By intentionally causing a situation that would cause complications you can teach them what to do, ways they can comfort themselves. Most of the time for my pupil it’s through moment of confusion that she can act aggressively. My pupil processes things much slower and needs time to work it out in her mind, so most of the time she just needs space and time. So I’m also learning a lot of new things and a lot of patience.

So we just finished our October holidays and the new term starts tomorrow and although I had an eventful Holiday in London I missed the routine of Camphil and all my friends here. Being away from here just made me miss Seattle and it was hard to cope, so I really need a place to call home and a place to return to and I think this is a nice one for now.

London was nice and I got to visit with an old co-worker of mine from the Sheiling School who showed us around!

Well I love you all very much and thinking of you often!

Till next time keep working hard and sweet dreams,

Cheers,

Ilaria

I would also like to give a special thank you to my daddy Bob who saved me when I got stuck in London and thought I may not ever make it back! Also to my friend David who showed me around a London and gave me the best night out and also saved me from two nights on the floor of the Victoria Station! I owe you both an arm and a leg!

Julia as well thank you for letting us stay with you, your wonderful dear!